About a Boy

My favorite thing about this movie isn’t Hugh Grant, though he gives one of his best performances. It isn’t Nicholas Hoult, who is equally wonderful and objectively I think the best part of the film. It also isn’t the soundtrack, which is catchy and pretty and tonally perfect. This movie, unlike maybe some others in my very extensive collection, is well known enough and was a big enough hit that I don’t really feel the need to talk about any of those things.

What I do want to talk about, what is my favorite part of About a Boy, is Toni Collette crying while she makes breakfast.

There’s this thing about depression that’s probably the worst part of it (all of the parts are the worst part) – and that’s how dreadfully boring it is. You can spill the milk while you make breakfast, something everyone does, all the time, but it’s another one of your failures. And now you’re crying over it, and trying to pretend you’re not, and you know it doesn’t matter and you’re irritated with yourself, and that’s another failure – that you’re bothered by things that don’t matter. There’s no grand tragedy to any of it, it’s a ruined breakfast and a mess you’re too tired to clean up and people looking at you like they’re afraid, and it’s exhausting, and embarrassing.

It’s when Fiona spills the milk – there’s something about the way her shoulders droop and she almost laughs – it’s another thing, another failure, it is almost funny. The fact that all of this is happening while her son Marcus watches isn’t lost on her - the character gets a lot of flak for her selfishness, and she is selfish, but knowing you are something isn’t enough to pull you out of being that thing. It’s one of those things that people who have never experienced severe depression say to those of us who have: “you’re being selfish.” It’s nothing you haven’t said to yourself. It’s another one of your failures. It does sound ridiculous when articulated: Fiona probably tried to kill herself because she ruined breakfast, and who does that? It is selfish. It's embarrassing.

That’s my favorite part of About A Boy, which is a very well made and well acted film – how Fiona’s depression is so uncomfortable, ridiculous, selfish, and very serious. It’s frustrating for everyone who has to deal with her. Marcus keeps trying to manage it, to find the perfect solution that will make her happy forever and though she’s alive and smiling at the end, the film wisely avoids wrapping Fiona’s illness in a bow and calling it fixed. She’s not hiding a dark secret, and she doesn't have any more complicated a past than anyone else. She needs a little more help, and she finally gets it, and that’s good – for her and for the people who depend on her, because About A Boy is a story about depending on people for good or bad.

Recommend?

I would. This wasn’t a complete review, but those are easy enough to find. The best word to describe About a Boy would probably be "nice," which sounds tepid and weak so I'll go with "kind." It isn't sentimental at all, though it's ultimately very forgiving of frailty. And it's funny.

Hugh Grant really is wonderful, and stays just to the right side of sentimentality. Nicholas Hoult is just as good, and I’m always a sucker for stories about weird and lonely kids. I think it might be the best adaptation of a Nick Hornby novel I've seen.

Clips

The sweater Marcus wears in this scene tells you everything you need to know about him and his mother:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXYxfwVioeE